Here's the rest of the story!
Honestly, I'm not a "history of royal families" fan.
I don't consciously seek out those kinds of stories on my seven local PBS channels, as I much prefer the travelogues, the cooking shows, Bill Ross, the mystery solvers, nature and science programs, bios of actors and dancers and musicians and artists... in other words, the plethora of other topics covered.
But those SIX ex-wives woke me up this morning, singing their songs, waving their microphones, and sashaying all over my mental stage.
Clearly, they wanted clarity.
However, while looking deeper into their lives, Henry emerged.
I won't say that he was an angel, because he certainly was not.
Whenever he could, he took the path of least resistance.
Finding a wife?
His first one had been betrothed to his older brother ever since 1488, when she was only three years old.
That was Catherine of Aragon, transported from Spain in 1501, not even knowing the language, to wed Arthur.
She was 16, he was 15, and he was dead within months from illness.
That left her as still a virgin, so Henry's family deemed her still as marriageable and engaged her to the 11-year-old Henry.
Fine.
That left her to hang fire until 1509, when they were wed.
Henry was 18 and she was 24 by then, so they set to trying to make an heir.
Within a year they had a daughter, but she died as an infant.
Three more miscarriages, including two sons, followed before they had a child that lived; that daughter was Mary, born in 1516, to a 30-year-old Catherine and 24-year-old Henry.
One more stillborn two years later marked the end of the possibility of him having a male heir from that source.... so he cast his eye around... and didn't even have to leave the palace.
By 1525, at the age of 34 years old, he was panting after Anne Boleyn, a lively and fashionable lady in waiting for his wife.
Anne's birth year is disputed, but one thing is clear: she was younger than Henry by at least a decade, if not more.
She insisted that he divorce Catherine and marry her, but the Catholic church did not agree... so Henry set about closing the monasteries and nunneries, shutting down their presence in England.
Catherine was sent to live in in a series of other castles, though without their daughter, Mary, who remained with Henry.
Henry and Anne were secretly wed late in 1532, then formally wed early in 1533, and Henry was excommunicated from the Catholic church shortly after.
So, at 42 years old, he declared himself the head of the Church of England and settled that argument.
By early September of 1533, Anne had their daughter, Elizabeth, and not the son he had so long sought.
Then Anne had a series of three miscarriages... which, to Henry, signaled the end of her childbearing years... so he cast his eye around... and didn't even have to leave the palace.
Jane Seymour was right there, a lady in waiting for Anne Boleyn, after having served as lady in waiting for Catherine since the late 1520's.
There followed a series of unfortunate events.
First, in January of 1536, Catherine died and was buried.
Second, later that same month, Anne had her third miscarriage, which happened to be of a son.
Third, during that same month, Henry had begun wooing Jane with gifts.
Anne's days were numbered; by mid-May that year, she was accused and convicted of adultery (with four men) and treason (a plot to murder Henry), with the final judgement being beheading, which was conducted May 19, 1536.
The very next day, Henry wed Jane; he was 45, she was 28.
By January of 1537, Jane was pregnant and life was good for her and Henry.
She was not the party girl and remodeler that Anne had been, nor did she argue with Henry, preferring to be the quiet, supportive wife.
Yes, life was finally looking up for Henry!
Their son, Edward, was born in October of 1537 - their son!
But Jane died of complications of childbirth, about two weeks later.
Henry now had three children, and three dead wives, having lost all three of his wives within two years of each other.
He was 46 years old.
He took a break from rushing into another marriage.
After all, he had a male heir, so his royal line was secure.
Still, an alliance against France and the Holy Roman Empire would be good to have, so he sought a bride from Germany, depending on portraiture for his choice.
In January of 1540, his selection, Anne of Cleves, arrived and they wed.
However, they never quite clicked, the 25-year-old German-speaking woman and the 48-year-old English-speaking king... but he couldn't very well lop off her head if he wanted Germany to be o his side, could he?
Henry had the marriage annulled six months later, but still kept her in England, calling her "the King's Beloved Sister" and setting her up quite nicely with her own castle and lands and money.
That left him still in need of a child-bearing prospect... so he cast his eye around... and found what he sought at her palace.
Catherine Howard was a 17-year-old lady in waiting for Anne of Cleves.
She was also the first cousin of Anne Boleyn, but apparently learned nothing from her cousin's fate.
By July of 1540, scarcely after the ink was dry on the annulment papers for his marriage to Anne of Cleves, the randy 49-year-old king was wed to the teenager.
Within a year, he'd discovered that not only was she not a virgin, but she'd had sex with multiple lovers, with no marriage to any of them!
The teen was accused of adultery and treason and locked away in November of 1541, with two of her lovers being killed (one by beheading, the other by hanging) in December of 1541, with their heads impaled on stakes on the bridge.
She, herself, was finally convicted and beheaded in February of 1542.
Alone again, Henry cast about for another wife, finding one at the abode of his 27-year-old daughter, Mary.
Ah, but Catherine Parr was no starry-eyed ingenue.
Already twice-wed and twice-widowed, the 31-year-old had another husband in mind, but canceled those plans when the 52-year-old Henry insisted she wed him.
That was in July of 1543.
No fool her, she was sure to install women she knew and trusted into her household with him, to grant him no new temptations.
It's doubtful he would have tried, as morbidly obese as he was, and with physical ailments that made him rather immobile.
He died in January of 1547, at 55 years old, leaving Catherine Parr a widow for the third time.
By then, she was 35 years old, but finally free to wed Thomas Seymour, the brother of Jane Seymour, when he again asked her.
They wed, in secret, four months after Henry's death.
That didn't do over very well with the royals!
Within a year, she was pregnant, which was a wonder, as she had been thought to be barren, having never been pregnant through her other three marriages.
On August 30, 1548, she gave birth to a daughter, Mary Seymour, then Catherine died of childbirth complications within a week.
She was 36 years old.
So, by September of 1548, Henry VIII was dead, five of his six wives were dead, leaving only Anne of Cleves still living.
She did so for almost another ten years, outliving Henry's son (Edward VI died in 1553) and dying just one year before Henry's first daughter (Mary I died in 1558).
Anne of Cleves was only in her early 40's.
Only the second daughter, Elizabeth I, lived a full life, reaching 69 before her death in 1603, having served as the Queen of England and Ireland for 44 years.
That's a longer reign than her father had, and certainly more than her mother - Anne Boleyn - ever dreamt possible.
Wow...
... and all of that led up to two seniors at Cambridge writing a musical to be presented at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe.
Okay, history lesson over, let's resume our lives, shall we?
(smile!)
