changing the tv channel

Seriously.
I think the changing of the television channel at The Distillery has flipped some kind of friendship switch into the "off" position for Hai.
Not for me. Just for him.
The day had gone well. He was without a car still (his had been wrecked), so I had picked him up about 5:30 and we headed to the Jepson Center. In celebration of the Marilyn exhibit, they were screening "The Misfits", a film I don't recall every seeing before. It was a western, of all things, and starred Marilyn Monroe, Clark Gable, and Montgomery Clift, in a screenplay crafted by Marilyn's husband, Arthur Miller.
It was a rather dark film, with all of the characters being damaged goods. In particular, the aging, alcoholic cowboy which Clark Gable played bore an uncanny resemblance to my middle brother. (Perhaps because that brother bears a likeness to the actor and has been bestowed with the nickname "Clark Gable" by Mr. Willie? Possibly.)
At any rate, I was a bit subdued after the film.
Hai was not. He was chomping at the bit to get to the eatery. Hungry? No.
You see, tonight they were featuring one of the breweries in their upstairs area. As a member of their loyalty club, he would be able to get some swag from the featured brewery.
So, we hopped on over there.
That's when the trouble began.
As soon as we arrived, he had to stop and chat with two fellows out front. The chat became extended, but he did not introduce me to them.
Fine, whatever.
Then, as soon as we entered the place, he jetted upstairs, with no fare thee well or anything. Just sprinted up the wooden steps as though they were giving away cash money and he was missing out.
Rather rude, right?
But he's a friend, not a boyfriend, and a rather young friend at that, so I would just let it slide.
I was hungry and thirsty, so I asked to be seated by the hostess, letting her know there would be two, eventually. I had noticed that "The Terror of Tiny Town" was on a couple of the huge tv sets and asked to be seated such that I could watch the movie. The hostess led me to a table with a great view of one of the bar tvs and all was well.
Briefly.
I placed my order and texted Hai to let him know what I was doing.
After all, The Distillery is one of his favorite places. I wanted to let him know all was okay, that they even had a fun movie to entertain me, instead of all the sports on the other ten thousand televisions there.
So, that's how things fared for about 15 minutes. Just long enough for me to get my iced tea and the hummus platter, still with no Hai in sight or responding to my texts.
But he responded to this one.
Damn. Some idiot just had them change the channel to THE SAME BASKETBALL GAME THAT IS ON THE OTHER BAR TV. Damn.
Seriously, the two tv sets are EACH at least five feet long and are set along the back of the 14-foot bar. What blind fool was unable to watch the game? What idiot of a bartender didn't bother to point that out or cut off the blind drunk?
I asked the hostess, my waitress, and another waitress to please have the tv channel changed back to the movie.
Nothing happened.
Both of the bar tvs continued to show the EXACT SAME GAME.
Then the waitress came and she had my order wrong. She had brought the sandwich when I had specifically asked for the salad.
Eventually, as I said, Hai showed up, his pockets stuffed with beer glasses.
Not beer mugs. Not beersteins.
Just regular-sized glasses with beer logos on them.
Ooooh. Aaaahhh.
Did he ask them to change the channel for me?
No.
No, he acted like I was somehow at fault and that I was going to sully his regard for the place because I was unwilling to be ignored and disregarded.

Sigh.

We left shortly after we finished our meals.
I even tipped the bad waitress well, so as to not mess up his mojo there.
Somehow, I don't think I need to have bothered.
I think his switch has flipped to "off".

That will be very sad.
We have certainly had some grand adventures these past few months.

all mine, my Precious

I hate feeling like I'm broke.
I most definitely AM broke. And I certainly dislike being broke.
But I truly hate feeling like I'm broke.
You get the distinction?
For the past few weeks, I find myself playing this little game. It's called "wanna go to a movie?" and it goes like this:
1) since I have a bit of time on my hands these days, I'll pull up the cinema schedules to see what's playing;
2) I select a movie with a near-future start time and allow myself to look forward to going to it;
3) I putz around on the computer or in the house until too late to actually GO to the movie (even taking into account the fifteen minutes of ads and previews beforehand);
4) I tell myself it's just as well that I missed it as I don't have the money anyway for such things;
5) depending on the time, wait a few hours or a day and play again.
It gets to be quite frustrating, as I know before I look at the schedules that I'm most likely NOT going to the movie.
It all ties in too nicely with this new pity party I've been having.

I've been working hard on this pity party for weeks. I really have.
Today, I decided to toss an invite to my bff and see if she would rsvp.
She did, of course.
That's what bffs do.
Especially since I'm the 'glass half-full' gal most of the time.

Here's my invite to her, just after eleven o'clock this morning:
me: Life is hard. really sux right now.

bff: For you? What's up?

me: My stepbrother is dying, the peace Guy is gone, the first niece lives across town, no one to hug, no health insurance, no money coming in, the bfe busy with tenure stuff. I could go on.

bff: ugh. Sounds like you need beach and tequila.

me: I think I need more than that. At least the folks in the Student Success Committee were glad to have me yesterday, even tho i wasn't allowed to Chair it anymore.

me: The faculty Senate made me vacate the position when they found i was part-time status. Ditched me by unsigned email. Bass turds.

bff: yeah, that was wrong. They don't know what they are missing.

me: That is EXACTLY what the folks on the StuSucCom said! too many people do committee work just to pad their resumes. that's bullshit to do that.

bff: You have just got a big heart...

bff: maybe it's time for you to start sleeping your way to the top... haha.

me: yeah. not gonna happen. Cannot even picture that act with the dean or dept head.

bff: Maybe you and I should move to Montana and become old-lady pole dancers!!!

me: that could definitely be fun. :-)

bff: Well sweetheart, hang in there. Life really sux sometimes.

me: Heard.

No, I didn;t tell her about my middle brother living in the woods in a tent and dining on goodies from grocery store dumpsters.
He actually dines better than I do much of the time, having fresh meat a-plenty versus the canned meat I usually buy.
Plus, she is already aware of that.

No, I didn't whine about the lethargy and ennui fogging my path daily. After all, I can usually fight my way clear when I have papers to grade.
Because she is aware of that, too.

No, I didn't harp on the mess my house is most of the time, piles of unfiled papers, dust on nearly every ledge, dead palmetto bugs upside-down on the sunroom floor.
She's seen it and she is not fazed. She has seen how quickly I can whip it into shape when given the incentive.

No, i didn't add that my car has extra shakes or my air conditionling has an intermittent problem or I still have a critter traipsing around in my attic.
She would just look at me and ask why I hadn't already taken care of these bits and pieces?
After all, she has heard of some of the issues for months and months...

And how would my rising debt be any news to her? Heck, I've always had credit card fever and lately I've let it ride. She's been down that road, too, and we both know how to deal with it. Mine is starting to feel a little out of control, hence the "wanna go to a movie?" game.

Tonight, I started playing the game again. And, as usual, I putzed around until almost too late to catch the movie. Almost, but not quite.
The ticket didn't cost me anything, either. I had a free pass for that cinema, a free pass that the peace Guy had laft for me to use when he moved to Jet City.
So, in a way, he paid for me to go see the movie. What a treat!
So I treated myself to popcorn and a soda.
And this particular movie was just what my doctor would have ordered for me, if she had been aware that I was feeling so overwhelmed by life in general and everything in particular.
Watching demons and evil vampires get returned to the dust from which they rose is pretty damn satisfying.
Almost as relaxing as killing zombies.
Now, I'm not quite right as rain, but I'm getting there.
And tomorrow my car has an appointment for a remedy.